I’m pretty sure most of you are being bombarded with social media posts, blog posts and stories about setting New Year’s resolutions by now. Real talk. I’m already over it. 

New Year's Resolutions: Don't Fall For The Rope A Dope | Naturally Stellar

I’m Not Buying Into New Year’s Resolutions

I gave up on the whole making resolutions thing a couple of years ago because I noticed that whenever I made resolutions for myself, I never seemed to follow through on them. I think one of the reasons is because my resolutions were never realistic. I was just basing them on things that I thought I should be focusing on for the year or because that’s what other people were focusing on. We all do that sometimes right?

We look into the lives of other people and we assume that this is the program that we should be following for our lives. If we see someone setting a resolution to travel every season we start to look at our own selves and say you know what? I need to travel more too!

Don’t Set Goals Based On Untruths

Too often we fall into the traps of messages in media that tell us we’re not good enough. All these images and messages just sitting there waiting for us. Ready to tell us that we don’t look good. To tell us we don’t have what it takes to succeed. Making us think that we need to have more “things”. We don’t dress right. Don’t act right. We don’t live right. They make us believe that our parenting skills suck and that our ability to balance our work lives with our personal lives is impossible.

Then at the year’s end, we make promises to ourselves that we are going to accomplish this ridiculous laundry list of things once the clock strikes 12:01 a.m January 1st. 

New Year's Resolutions: Don't Fall For The Rope A Dope | Naturally Stellar

Goals, in and of themselves are great. Don’t get me wrong.

But with every goal that we set, we need to be realistic about what we want to accomplish and set plans based on our lives and who we are.

I would much rather spend my time setting goals and making improvements in my life based on realizations that I come to about myself. I would rather work on getting to know myself well enough to assess where I need to make changes. Rather than letting someone else do that assessment for me.

So I’m not gonna share any resolutions with you this year. But what I will share are little tidbits of wisdom and encouragement.

You ready? Here’s my first tidbit of insight and advice for 2019.

New Year's Resolutions: Don't Fall For The Rope A Dope | Naturally Stellar

Don’t fall for the Rope A Dope

Stop looking at the surface and at the paint. What I mean by this is…stop looking at the “lives” of people around you, social media influencers or celebrities and making comparisons to your own. This is one of the biggest mistakes that I see women doing every day. We see these curated lives of people at work, in church, online, on TV or in magazines. Even though we are smart enough 2 understand that what we see isn’t always real, some of us still subconsciously do the comparison.

Keep in mind that I’m not going to share things with you that I’m not willing to do myself.

I’m making a conscious choice to stop looking at people around me, on my Instagram and Facebook feeds, or just in general. To stop assuming that what people portray is their full story.

I can’t tell you how many of my colleagues leave out facts like job losses, broken marriages, evictions, drug use, mental health issues etc. You name it and people are going through it. All kinds of things that would create a different spin on their brands.


Full disclosure. I do it too.

There are things in my life that I specifically choose not to share on social media. Certain things about my kids I don’t discuss. Not because there’s anything sinister going on. But because there are just some things that I want to hold back about my life that are precious to me and to my family. I don’t believe in putting my entire life on display for people anyway.

So as you move forward into 2019, if you find yourself looking at someone else’s life online or offline, and start making comparisons with your own. Remember that there is a real person behind every picture in every story. A person that poops and pees just like you do. They go through life’s struggles just like you do and they don’t have it all figured out.

CHECK THIS OUT ✴  This Is How We Family

Who you are is just fine. However, if you see something in your life that you would like to change this year, then change it. But do it for you. 

Do you. Be you. Love you.

Happy New Year!

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    What are some goals that you’re working on for yourself this year?

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Founder, Editor-in-Chief of Women's Lifestyle Blog, Naturally Stellar | Beauty Writer and Content Creator | I left corporate life 7+ years ago, to pursue my goal of becoming a writer. Boom!! I did that! Now I'm an accomplished writer and boss babe running a successful blog business. You should hire me! #RockStarMoms

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